Today, as I was about to begin meditation, a question arose quite unprompted from within: “Why do I meditate?” I was surprised by this as I have meditated for many years. Remembering Gurumayi’s teaching, I intuited that there would be “electrifying grace” in asking myself this fundamental question.
The answer arose very easefully from within, and it gave a deeper impetus to my practice this morning. I knew I wasn’t meditating simply out of habit or to feel better, but with the highest intention and goal.
I decided to take this further by asking myself why I performed the other core Siddha Yoga practices—chanting, dakshina, seva. With each one, I reveled in the understanding and conviction that arose from within.
As my sadhana progresses, I am grateful for this experience of questioning and going deeper in my understanding and experience of the Siddha Yoga practices.
Havant, United Kingdom
For the last few days I’ve been taking into meditation these words of Gurumayi’s: “May I recognize that my being here is the greatest adventure that’s ever happened.”
One of the first insights that arose is that I have recently been taking steps to be more fully present at work—in terms of showing up with courage and allowing myself to be seen and heard in more of a leadership role. It has been a good growth curve involving accountability and also a degree of vulnerability—and one I had earlier avoided.
What I’ve noticed, though, is that I feel more exhilarated and that mini-miracles happen around me. One example? I happen to be in the right place at the right time to have the right conversation with just the right person. It feels like, by stepping forward in this way, I’ve moved into the heart of flow. I see that this does feel like an adventure, and that it also relies on “my being here”—I have to be committed and present in order to experience the unfolding.
Guildford, United Kingdom
For a long time, I had lost conscious contact with the Siddha Yoga path and teachings. Today, after reading Gurumayi’s teaching, I realize that I am now able to appreciate every bit of light that other people shone my way during that time—even when I was “oblivious to the magnitude” of their benevolence. Now, I am learning to appreciate the continued teachings and subtle presence of the Guru in my life.
There is so much that I already have been given. My task now is to remain connected to grace, in the same way that the Guru has stayed with me throughout my
sadhana. There is so much more to experience! I am grateful.
Florida, United States
As I read “Questioning, Persisting, Understanding...,” my heart softened and expanded with gratitude for being fortunate enough to have a living Guru. A subtle shift occurred in my consciousness, and I experienced my individual, limited identity dissolve. I had the experience of being unified Consciousness, with inner and outer harmony. All that remained was blissful silence, vibrating with love and gratitude.
California, United States
My Sadhana Circle had such an inspiring time studying Gurumayi’s teaching. As we reflected on her words, related them to our lives and experiences, and put forth effort to understand them, we learned from and built on each other’s ideas and insights. I felt like we were engaging in the kind of inquiry Gurumayi was describing in her teaching—bringing together the power of the intellect and the Self.
I personally experienced several new discoveries during our time together, including one relating to the
seva that I offer. I sometimes focus very intensely on trying to make that
seva come out just right. Lately, I had begun to wonder if I was overdoing this. Yet, when my Sadhana Circle studied this teaching together, I understood that this effort that I make in offering
seva often brings my physical brain and supreme Self together. This explains why making this effort often makes me feel happy and invigorated.
California, United States
For many years I have been practicing the five-part contemplation method taught in the
Siddha Yoga Home Study Course. I am grateful for this way of asking questions and receiving answers. After reading Gurumayi’s teaching, I realized that I use both my intellect and my heart when I engage in this contemplation practice. And, when I become still to listen for any answers that may arise from within, I am opening myself to deeper understanding. I don’t always receive answers immediately when I contemplate in this manner, so I have found that I must persist with patience in this divine
sadhana of understanding. I have also noticed that, instead of asking questions about my daily life, I am taking a leap to ask deeper questions, such as those mentioned by Gurumayi in her teaching. I trust that grace is with me on this path of study that the Guru has given me.
Warrnambool, Australia
Recently I had been grappling with some questions which seemed to strike at the very heart of my ordered life. Initially, I sought answers with my mind alone, and simply could not find any. I felt upset by these questions and wished they would resolve themselves neatly and disappear.
However, as I continued to engage with them, I entered a different space within, my own version of the “
anubhava mantapa” that Gurumayi discusses. Here, the relentless to-ing and fro-ing of my mind found rest—not so much in neat answers, but in a state of kindness, space, and timelessness. The questions themselves have become something I am grateful for. They have secured a clearer pathway between my intellect and my divine Self. I now enter this “
anubhava mantapa” more freely and find myself in an inner silence more frequently. Gurumayi’s teaching has confirmed, articulated, and solidified this process for me, for which I am so grateful. My Guru has reminded me of “the perfectness of the divine hand in my life.”
Hampton, Australia
One of the things that stood out for me in Gurumayi’s teaching was how much it resonated with my experience of the Sadhana Circle that I participate in. It reminded me of the way that many of our conversations can end with us falling into a state of silence, into a state of love where there are no more words—and how we then rest there.
I loved this acknowledgement of the power of the Sadhana Circle to help me “question, persist, and understand.” I believe that our study together enables me to answer the questions Gurumayi asks us in this teaching, as well as those that I ask of myself. My Sadhana Circle companions are like the roses in Gurumayi’s story, which infuse my life with a beautiful fragrance. And they definitely “point out the fruits” of my “
tapasya” when I don’t see them. And they help to keep me on the path.
This teaching has opened my heart to acknowledge and offer gratitude for the gift of my
sadhana companions, the gift of my Sadhana Circle, and the gift of the Guru’s copious grace streaming into my being.
Sydney, Australia
After reading the questions that Gurumayi poses in this teaching, I decided to use the five-part contemplation method from the
Siddha Yoga Home Study Course to explore them further.
I began with “What am I doing here?” As I wrote out my ideas, answers began to gradually emerge from my intellect, such as, I am here to love and serve God and to recognize God in everyone and everything. Then, I asked the Self for the answer to this question and waited for a response. Gradually, the answer that came was that I am here to live in the light. My heart was elated as this rang with such Truth.
Next, I contemplated what it would mean to live in the light. The answers I received were: to be light, to bring light to people and situations, to relish living in the light, to experience the power, bliss, and love that living in the light brings, and to make enlightened choices.
May I learn to embody light and remember to keep living in the light. I am so grateful to Gurumayi for these profound questions.
Burnaby, Canada
Recently I had become stuck trying to convey in writing the nature of the Goddess from a nondual understanding. I struggled to find the words to express my love or understanding, yet it felt deeply important to try. I gave up several different times, feeling quite at a loss. Yet, each time I heard Gurumayi’s words urging me on: “Questioning, Persisting, Understanding.” And I would return to my writing. Slowly, the words I was searching for began to emerge. By listening, offering, pausing, reflecting, and asking for the Guru’s help, I began to understand whole new aspects of the concept that had baffled me. I was able to realize subtle points that had long hindered my understanding without me even knowing it. My heart warmed with gratitude.
And then I marveled as I realized that the whole process had actually arisen due to my contemplation of Gurumayi’s teaching, “Reclaiming, Renaming, Reconceiving,” which had led me to a perception of the Goddess that reached far beyond my previously limited conceptions of a judgmental deity.
Washington, United States
I was very young—just nine years old—when questions about my existence arose within me, such as “Who am I?” and “Where do I come from?” I remember looking at myself in the mirror and trying to make meaning of who it was I was seeing in the reflection.
As I grew up I continued to ask myself these deep questions. Periods of fear alternated with moments of serenity. I always felt that the answers to my questions were there inside me. A turning point came in 1992 when I received Gurumayi’s guidance that what I was experiencing was longing, not anguish. This understanding brought a ray of light to my existential questions.
Afterwards and still today I follow my
sadhana with great discipline and respect for the gifts I receive. I continue to ask questions, not with fear or anguish, but with the awareness that behind every question there is an ardent desire to know and understand my true nature.
San Giorgio a Cremano, Italy
I read Gurumayi’s teaching carefully, trying to identify everything I thought was particularly important to me. Then I realized that Gurumayi’s every word and every statement are actually important to me. As I continued to study Gurumayi’s teaching, my mind became so quiet that I didn’t even want to think anymore. I sat back and rested within myself. It was a wonderful moment of freedom.
Konolfingen, Switzerland
In these demanding times, what grace it is to have a living Guru!
This morning, as I was meditating after reciting
Shri Guru Gita, this phrase arose from within me: “Between heaven and earth, I dwell in my heart.” I repeated this phrase over and over. It comforted me.
Tonight, as I read this new teaching by Gurumayi, I felt an echo of this morning’s revelation.
“What am I doing here?” I dwell in my heart, and in this sacred dwelling place resides my beloved Guru.
Montreal, Canada
I read this amazing teaching as the full moon was shining in through my window. I felt as if Gurumayi’s words were uniting the celestial universe with my very own mind.
I learn from this teaching how to be in communion with my
sadhana companions while holding the awareness that the full light of the Guru is within me. I am so grateful for my Guru’s compassion and her constant presence in my life.
New York, United States
Since my release from prison, I have been a regular participant in Sadhana Circles. They always help to improve my understanding, assimilation, and implementation of the Siddha Yoga teachings.
And now Gurumayi has given us so many more teachings that we can study in the Sadhana Circles. I will be studying this wonderful teaching in order to bring freshness to our next meeting.
The process of spiritual growth is so blissful! I am so grateful, and so determined to grow.
Oregon, United States
“How will I know what I need to know?”
As I contemplate this question from Gurumayi, I recall that insights have arisen at the most unexpected times in my life, and I believe this will continue to happen.
I realize that it is always my responsibility to be vigilant, to pay attention to what arises, and to take it into my heart. With my Guru’s grace and my self-effort and curiosity, I have faith that all that needs to be revealed will be when the time is right.
There are times when I experience frustration, when it feels like my
sadhana has plateaued, when life seems to be going a bit sideways. It is then my duty “to stay the course,” continue to engage with the practices, remember my good fortune at having received
shaktipat initiation from my Guru—and to never take any of this for granted.
West Vancouver, Canada
“May my mind take refuge in the perfectness of the divine hand in my life.” These words from Gurumayi are a balm for me.
There have been changes in my work setting, and I’ve been wondering whether it would affect me. On one hand, I’ve been a bit worried. On the other hand, I have been telling myself that grace is with me and that everything will work out in one way or another.
When I read Gurumayi's words, I felt them go straight into my heart. It was like Gurumayi was right with me. I felt deeply reassured and affirmed that things will work out. I felt I was not just giving myself an optimistic pep talk; I was telling myself the Truth.
I have been reading this sentence again and again, especially the phrase “…the perfectness of the divine hand in my life.” It is so beautiful, and I feel so close to Gurumayi when I read it.
California, United States
I awoke this morning with a strong desire to transcend the internal monologue in my mind. This kind of monologue results in my state going up and down, for example, with thoughts of things going well or not well, or with imagined justifications and defenses.
Reading this magnificent teaching from Gurumayi, I really want this priceless treasure to take full seat within my mind, conversations, and actions. I want to undertake the "questioning, persisting, understanding" that is illumined by the Heart, guided by the teachings of the Guru, and prompted, fueled, and confirmed by the yoga scriptures. This truly is the most exciting adventure I could ever embark upon!
Langwarrin, Australia