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My Lord Loves a Pure Heart – Excerpt 5

by Gurumayi Chidvilasananda

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After reading this passage and letting its wisdom permeate my being, I feel that life has become sweeter and more harmonious.

I had previously found it impossible to forgive and let go of hard and angry feelings when I was hurt by people I love. I let their behaviors irritate me and their words sting me. Now I let these roll over me. When I forget and catch myself chewing over perceived transgressions, I let go and return to my still space within. I am more optimistic and have more energy to get things done.

I am deeply grateful.

Lismaore Heights, Australia

“Don’t think about others. Leave them alone.” These words of Gurumayi’s as she asked us to reflect on our own anger caught my attention. When I read them, it occurred to me that most of the time when I am angry, it is either because I believe that others are causing all my problems or because I want others to do what I want.

As I contemplated Gurumayi’s words further, I decided that I would try to leave others alone by not blaming them for my anger or for anything else. Now, whenever I notice that I am getting impatient, irritated, or angry, I try to quickly check what is going through my mind. I attempt to examine why I am feeling angry. This introspection often saves me from carrying on with the angry mood.

I am so grateful to Gurumayi for her guidance and teachings.

Melbourne, Australia

In this passage Gurumayi has eloquently described the forms of anger. This has reminded me of King Shivaji’s elephant: when the wild elephant of anger is on a rampage, it destroys everything in its path.
Why has my inner elephant of anger run wild? Because I was attached to my limited identities. The moment I detached myself from my limited identities, I could transcend the experience that had been brewing the storm of anger inside. 
I realize that it is my responsibility to “sweep the path clean every day” with right understanding and by regularly engaging myself with the Siddha Yoga practices.

Sydney, Australia

The face of anger in the form of old resentments and bearing grudges has caused me so much suffering. Studying Gurumayi’s and Baba’s words, I have learned this results from how I have chosen to think about things. Yet it’s no easy task to change my viewpoints and allow new light-filled choices into my mind! 
Now that I’m in my 70s, I can look back over the years, see my limited perceptions, and feel galvanized to “change my spots”! One way that is working for me is to see myself and the person or situation I resent and bear a grudge against as being made of light rather than, say, skin and bones. And when I then begin to feel my spirits lifting into a more beautiful, natural state of consciousness, I bless the person, situation, and myself. Often I hold an imaginary magic wand above our heads and allow glistening sparkles to descend on us. This experience is so alive and grace-filled!

Oregon, United States

As Gurumayi explained, the cause behind my anger is often my wish to get things done in my own way! When I would get angry at someone, the other person would act as if they agreed with my point of view. At the end I would have a feeling that I had been “correct” or a feeling of being victorious.
But now I have realized that in this way, I was nourishing and protecting my inner enemies so that they would just become stronger. In the same way, the  different forms of anger that Gurumayi identified are the weapons which directly attack my chance to experience inner peace.

Sydney, Australia

I grew up in an angry house where anger burned hearts. I held my breath to make myself less visible. Now, I avoid anger in myself and others or freeze, as if holding myself like a wall for anger to splash over and move on. I also pray when I feel angry, because I am afraid that, once my anger gets ignited, I will become that angry house I remember.
I have learned from Gurumayi's book The Great Hiss, to not get stepped on. That's still a journey. Now that I have read this excerpt by Gurumayi, I will ask myself when I feel anger arising, “Is there something I want that I feel I am not getting?” Then I can pause and, instead of getting angry, I can offer my wish to God. Then God will have it and I can let it go. I can continue taking actions but the goal belongs to God.

New York, United States

I lived with anger for many years—sometimes more, sometimes less, sometimes much less, and sometimes almost constantly. I have worked on myself in the last several years to get rid of this inner enemy by transforming it. Especially last year, it was my intention for the year. I knew that anger was the one thing that was making me and others around me feel miserable.
One day, I had a meditation in which these five words appeared to me: sweetness, love, understanding, compassion, containment. Since then, I don’t repeat to myself that I want to get rid of anger. Rather, my intention every day is to speak, listen to, look at, and touch in a sweet, loving, understanding, compassionate, and contained way. In this way, I focus my attention on these virtues, rather than in trying to get what I want whenever I want it. Each time I feel anger coming, I now know it can be transformed into virtues.

Berlin, Germany

Reading this excerpt reminds me of our Sadguru’s teaching that I must take responsibility for my own inner state. As I contemplate the teachings in this excerpt, I realize that my tendency to get irritated—especially with my twelve-year old—is called out here for what it is, namely, my stuff, not her “vivacity.” May I assimilate the wisdom of this perception and put into action the requisite antidotes.

Vermont, United States

One day I was walking around chanting to myself, absorbed in the chant, when suddenly a Romanian man who was working nearby spoke to me. He said nothing in English or Danish, but rather the Latin words Nihil sine deo, “Nothing without God.” He could not have understood the Sanskrit chant or known what it was about, but he had clearly sensed the sacred energy of the chant and its vibrations.

Reading Gurumayi’s words about anger, I thought of this because if I am angry and vibrate anger to the world, that is what will be received. But if I am chanting and in the presence of God, that is what I will vibrate— “Nothing without God”!

Hørsholm, Denmark

I had the feeling that Gurumayi was speaking directly to me in this excerpt. She confronted me with something I don't like about myself: anger. But not only did she confront me with it, she also showed me possibilities for overcoming my anger and its hidden siblings.

The more I confronted my anger, the more I realized how much it robs me of my own power, my joy in life, and my love. I analyzed moments that had made me angry and tried to find out why I chose anger to express myself and not love. Almost always the reason was my ego!

This realization has brought me further, because once I know where the root of the problem is, I can bring about change.

Unterlangenegg, Switzerland